Last autumn, I enrolled in the University of California, Berkeleyâs massive open online course to see if I might goose my felicity quotient through an understanding of the edicts dispensed almost daily by the USAâs happiness industrial complex. The course is free. Itâs Berkeley. And its instructors, Emiliana Simon-Thomas and Dacher Keltner, have been teaching the material for years. (Keltner created UC Berkeleyâs in 2001; the online program debuted in 2014. Other online happiness courses, as far I can tell, are derivative.)
The ten-week course kicks off with a robust introduction to the science of positive psychology, followed by seven weekly modules, parsed into themes: social connection, compassion and kindness, cooperation and reconciliation, mindfulness, mental habits of happiness, gratitude, and new frontiers of happiness research (like Keltnerâs pioneering work in the phenomenon called aweâmore on that in a bit). A midterm and final exam make up the remaining weeks.
My plan was to see the course through, no matter what. To guard against bailing, I shelled out an advance payment of $49 for a proof-of-completion certificate. If nothing else, Iâd send the thing to my sister-in-law, , whoâs been at me for years to do something about my preternatural angst. Later, I would learn that of the roughly 500,000 enrollees, only 8,000 have received certificatesâa completion rate of less than 2 percent.
The reason for so many lookie-loos? The workload, probably. All told, I plowed through more than 50 hours of materialâreading, videos, experiential exercises, quizzes, and examsâwhile squelching my uneasiness about the squishiness of social science and the field of positive psychology with its reliance on self-reporting. I would later learn that while happiness researchers are employing new studies grounded in the physical sciences, many are simply , and worse: Some have even been censured recently for their readers.
As the course progressed, Iâd come to view the science as commonsensicalâsimplistic even. To wit: Being a member of a supportive community confers positive vibes; quieting the mind alleviates stress; exercise tickles happiness hormones. Add to that the happiness insights passed down by the worldâs great thinkers over two millenniaâConfucius, the Buddha, Aristotle, and, uh, , among othersâand I would find myself wondering with each completed week: Why the science? Arenât these practices time-honored enough by now for us to understand that they more or less work as advertised? (Apparently not. The United Statesâ ranking continues to drop in the annual , where we currently sit in 18th place.)
Am I any happier after having taken the course? Not really. But if consuming the science failed to dampen my neuroticism, at least I walked away with a better understanding of the literatureâboth the research and the profusion of popular titles spilling off the self-help bookshelves. My conclusion? If I didnât know any betterâand I doubt the positive psychology community would admit thisâI would guess that happiness science cops many lessons from Buddhism. After all, it was arguably the Dalai Lama himself who launched the positivity craze with his 1998 book, The Art of Happiness. â[T]he very motion of our life is toward happiness,â he wrote in the bookâs opening paragraph.
âIt's almost embarrassing how, at the end of the day, we end up noticing this idea that the middle path is most productive,â Simon-Thomas told me when I called her a few weeks after completing the course. âFor some people, the biggest struggle from the course is self-compassion, really looking at themselves and taking the time to understand where their barriers and challenges to happiness lie, and making choices that align with happiness instead of suffering.â
If hewing to the middle way was the big aha I took from Simon-Thomas, Keltner, and all the rest, here are 13 smaller truths that helped point me and other happiness seekers in that direction.
#1. If Youâre Happy, Then You Probably Know It (So Clap Your Hands)
You cannot measure happiness without defining it, yet on the murkiness index, happiness is right up there with âsustainabilityâ and âwellness.â To some, happiness is the opposite of worry: enjoying good health, being free of troubles. To others, itâs living a meaningful life and giving to others, which is much closer in practice to the Aristotelian definition of happiness as . Sonja Lyubomirsky, a professor of positive psychology at UC Riverside and the author of The How of Happiness, characterizes it as âthe experience of joy, contentment, or positive well-being, combined with a sense that oneâs life is good, meaningful, and worthwhile.â (Positive psychologists use the terms âsubjective well-beingâ and âhappinessâ interchangeably.) The Nobel Prizeâwinning psychologist Daniel Kahneman identifies four levels of happiness: subjective, genetic, emotional, and sensate (like the feeling of a cool breeze on warm skin).
The bottom line: Researchers determine if someoneâs happy by asking them if theyâre happy. Donât take my word for it:
#2. The Great Bulk of Happiness Science Doesnât Measure Happiness
Happiness science is really no more than a fetching label for an amalgam of psychological, biological, and social studies, all of which measure a kind of emotional health. Research methods include observation, surveys, biomarkers, and measurement devices like fMRI to study such phenomena as relationships, self-compassion, concentration, affective state, and personality. Some of these findings appear to be at least once removed from a direct, evidential tie to happiness. I could be off here, but if researchers presuppose physical health is an important component of well-being, why do so many healthy folks feel perfectly wretched and go on to live long lives? In general, the happiness taxonomy seems as much art as science.
#3. Intimacy Harks Back to Infancy
Attachment theory, first developed in 1969, suggests that the quality of the attention we received from our primary caregivers can affect the intimacy and sustainability of our adult social connectionsâwhich are a major determinant of well-being, and even life expectancy. Infants who received consistent nurturing from their caregivers tend to enjoy stronger, more trusting relationships. Those with avoidant tendencies, which may result from neglectful caregiving, frequently find themselves on the outs with their romantic partners, which can set up a vicious cycle of relationship failure. But studies suggest that, with effort, .
Want to test for intimacy red flags in your relationships? Grab a partner and .
#4. Your Moneyâs No Good Here
At least one landmark study reports that those who come into loads of money are no happier than folks who donât. That said, if youâre destitute, money helps, but only up to a point: Kahneman postulates that point to be about $75,000 per year. According to the literature, we become habituated to sudden changes in our livesâlike winning the lotteryâa phenomenon called hedonic adaptation.
The good news: If an unexpected windfall wonât make you happy forever, then tragedy wonât permanently sink you either.
#5. Happiness Is as Slippery as a Greased Boar
By now we should know that buying wonât get us to the promised land. Thing is, most of us are really good at about the future, which means what will actually make us happy. Thus, we miss out on opportunities that could provide a meaningful boost (spending time with friends or family, say) and invest in stuff that looks sexy on the surface but wonât ultimately budge our happiness needles for good.
Recommended exercise: from Berkeley.
#6. Happiness Isnât a Feeling, Itâs a Practice
Lots of scientists subscribe to set point theoryâthe idea that our internal genetic happiness levels are more or less predetermined. And youâve probably heard that genetics is responsible for 50 percent of our happiness, with circumstance taking up 10 percent and individual initiative the remaining 40 percent. Although , who derived these pie slices, cautions that theyâre not exactly Newtonian, thatâs still a whole lot of genetics to overcome if you donât have a predilection for joy or optimism. This means youâd be well-served by thinking of happiness as a lifelong practice, much like mastering the forward paddle stroke.
At the same time, thereâs no such thing as single path to happiness, so scientists like Keltner and Simon-Thomas advise using a design-thinking approach to arrive at your best fit. âThink of it instead as a personal science experiment, or the ultimate word map; you donât have to figure everything out,â Simon-Thomas says. âItâs like youâve got all the ingredients in the kitchen and a couple of recipes, and you can try them and see which one tastes bad and which one makes you feel good.â
#7. Gratitude Is the Killer Happy App, but Donât Overdo It
Acknowledging what you haveâeven if it seems like you have very littleâwas the technique that most impressed me: simple, fast, , and, no, I didnât morph into a complacent bliss monkey by counting my blessings. At least , co-authored by Lyubomirsky, suggests that habitually counting your blessings boosts positive affect, something thatâs easily done by keeping a . While the task is simpleâat the end of the day, record all the good things that happened to youâresearchers recommend only three âdosesâ a week. Why? Simon Thomas told me thereâs no perfect answer to the conundrum of why less is more when it comes to gratitude but recommended adopting a varied regimen of what works best for any individual. âFor most of the so-called happiness practices,â Simon-Thomas said, âthereâs always the possibility of diminishing return with forced or obligatory over-repetition, like, âUh, letâs see, I am grateful for Post-it notesâŠfor being lots of colors.â Either it gets shallow or it makes us feel overextended. Think of it like exerciseâif a person exerts themselves continuously in the same kind of motion, they risk getting hurt.â
#8. Go Ahead, Embrace Your Angst
Simon-Thomas and Keltner made clear that the goal of the course isnât to teach you to surf a wave of bliss that never breaks. Itâs futile to happify your way through lifeâs vicissitudes, which are an inescapable part of the human experience. âAngst and melancholy are fundamental human emotions that have a particular functional purpose in our evolutionary trajectory,â Simon-Thomas says.
#9. Donât Go It Alone
Humans, irrational primates that we are, are often a pain in the ass, but we need one another. As Simon-Thomas and Keltner put it, weâre ultrasocial and wired to connect. In fact, thereâs an evolutionary basis for collectivism: As a species, weâve always gathered around a campfire, either literal or virtual. And apparently, although it seems counterintuitive, at least one researcher has found us to be a . Besides, itâs fun to trigger each otherâs neuropeptide called oxytocin, our endogenous âlove drug,â evoked when we cooperate, attach, affiliate, and, yeah, make whoopee.
#10. On Being Here Now
Perhaps no single wellness intervention has been the focus of as much scientific scrutiny as mindfulness, which has become a kind of panacea for all that ails the psyche, and for good reason: focusing on the present moment has been used to quiet humansâ capricious minds for thousands of years (recall my observation between Buddhism and happiness practices). Scientists claim mindfulness buoys well-being, strengthens attention, reduces stress, diminishes depression, and, hell, even slows aging. Different forms of âbody awareness, compassion, and meta-cognitiveâ different aspects of well-being.
Yet these findings come with a caveat: despite the many studies validating the efficacy of a mindfulness, several meta-analyses have found little evidence that such practices influenced positive emotions. In some cases, it would seem that mindfulness hype has
#11. Get Gobsmacked by Nature, Laugh, Play, and Go with the Flow
Evolutionary biologist E.O. Wilson coined the term âbiophiliaâ for humanityâs instinct to merge with other forms of life. Keltner has used the natural world in his research on the , which he defines as âthe feeling of being in the presence of something vast and greater than the self that exceeds current knowledge structures.â Think hugging a giant sequoia, skiing under the northern lights, or wandering through wilderness.
Keltnerâs emerging work in happiness identifies and play as integral to well-being. Cobbled together, I thought of two good friends tackling a big backcountry climbing objectiveâor .
#12. Happiness Has Nothing to Do with Meaningfulness, According to Some
While most well-being scientists of a purposeful life one subverted that notion. âHappiness was linked to being a taker rather than a giver,â the research team wrote, âwhereas meaningfulness went with being a giver rather than a taker. Higher levels of worry, stress, and anxiety were linked to higher meaningfulness but lower happiness.â
The paper made some key happiness researchers, including Lyubomirsky, not very happy. (More about that debate .) âWhen I think about the importance of separating happiness and meaningfulness,â Simon-Thomas told me, âthatâs where I hit a wall. If youâre truly living a happy life in this overarching way, a piece of that is that itâs meaningful to you.â
#13. Compassion Is Baked into Our Nervous System
More than 20 years ago, University of Chicagoâs Steve Porges introduced the polyvagal theory, which placed the vagus nerve at the center of human compassion. The love nerve, if you will. The vagus (Latin for âwanderingâ) is the longest nerve of the bodyâs autonomic nervous system, taking root at the top of the spinal cord and meandering down to the gut. The vagus nerve affects speech, how we direct our gaze, breathing, heart rate, digestion, andâof special interest to happiness researchersâour immune systems, inflammation responses, and the firing of oxytocin. In one experiment conducted in Keltnerâs Berkeley lab, college students watched videos of people in distress. The students with particularly strong vagal tone demonstrated greater empathy, sympathy, and compassion than those who lacked it. So, how to strengthen your vagal profile? Exercise and mindfulness, for starters. Completing some could help, too.
I found this âyouâve evolved to be kindâ notion the most disarming factoid of the hundreds served up over the ten weeks. When I caught up with Simon-Thomas, I fessed up: Iâve always assumed that humans harbor ulterior motives for our kindly acts. âThis is another common debate about altruism,â she told me. âLike, oh well, if you actually enjoy being nice to others, then youâre never truly altruistic. I find that to be a false dichotomy. Instead, it just means that, at a fundamental level, weâre wired to be altruistic over our basic design as a species.â
Her answer made me kind of happy.
Convinced? The next Berkeley Science of Happiness MOOC starts Sep 3, 2018.